I’ve cross-checked my sources and according to my cell phone, my wall calendar, my computer, and my beloved day planner, today is December 15. Shocking and just a bit scary to someone who’s been spinning in the perpetual whirlwind that is the academic calendar. Forget about the first half of this month, what happened to November? I could have sworn the terrifyingly awkward Math Department’s Halloween party was just a few weeks ago, in all its social glory.
But, no, here we are two weeks from the end of 2008 and the beginning of the end of the first decade of the new millennium. None of which really means anything to me, since my calendar now runs September-August until at least 2013 - and hopefully well beyond that, assuming Obama manages to save the economy and the ever-burgeoning academic job market between now and that auspicious date.
Lest I spend the entirety of this post discussing temporal dislocation (which, until the widely-declared “arctic blast” hit LA three days ago, I could also have blamed on the weather), let me turn now to the recent highlights, presented in my new favorite textual form. And brought to you by the number two:
- Last two bars I’ve been to: some place in West Hollywood and Hennessy’s in Hermosa Beach.
- Last two celebrity spottings, which occurred at each of said bars, respectively: Stanley from The Office (which meant much more to the people who identified him, seeing as I’ve never watched the show) and Pete Carroll and the USC football team (which, again, meant more to the people who identified him, seeing as they were former USC employees on a very drunken Holiday Sweater pub crawl).
- Last few celebrities to walk the red carpet at the Fox Theatre, two blocks from my apartment: Brad Pitt, Angelina Jolie, J.Lo, Jennifer Anniston, Owen Wilson, John Mayer, Katherine Heigl, Kate Winslet, and Leonardo DiCaprio. When Jake Gyllenhaal shows up, I will consider waiting amidst the screaming hordes. This list, by the way, is the result of three premieres that occurred over the past seven days. At this rate, Jake - and every other A-lister - should arrive next week.
- Last two papers I wrote, of this quarter’s three: “Dangerous Appetites: Negotiating the Body in Mary Rowlandson’s Captivity Narrative” and “What’s Love Got to Do With it?: Desire and Intimacy in Suzan-Lori Parks’ Venus.” Along with paper number three, “Sex and the Camera: Gaze Theory with a Contemporary, Cosmopolitan Twist,” and an extensive annotated bibliography, the total page count sits at seventy-six. Trombones are much less painful to produce.
- Last two goals of 2008: drive up to Palo Alto and back down without any incident and without any traffic (ha!). Get an unbelievable amount of rest and relaxation to make up for the past four months and to prepare for the whirlwind of 2009. See you on the flip side!